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Steps an LGBTQ+ Couple Can Take Early on to Prepare for Starting a Family

by | Fertility Blog

Lesbian couple planning their family

The decision to have a child marks a major milestone for any family, especially for LGBTQ+ families who face unique challenges in their parental experience. Families of all shapes and sizes have hurdles to overcome when getting ready to conceive, and while preparations are much the same for everyone, those in the LGBTQ+ community have their own special journeys with some distinctive steps. 

Thankfully, LGBTQ+ parents today enjoy rights and options unavailable to previous generations — options those generations fought hard to access. Though adoption remains an excellent choice for any family, reproductive medicine — formerly exclusive to the cis and straight communities — now offers the LGBTQ+ population more choices when it comes to growing their families. But before beginning down the fertility treatment path, it’s important to consider a few early steps. 

Don’t Go It Alone

A good support structure is a must for any new parents, especially when fertility treatments are on the table. Not only is parenthood a major change in lifestyle and priorities, it comes with a range of emotional and psychological challenges nobody should face on their own. Aspiring parents should find people they can trust and talk to, outside and especially within the LGBTQ+ community, as they can provide advice and support throughout the experience. 

Learn All You Can

LGBTQ+ families have many of the same options available to straight and cis parents in terms of fertility treatment.

  • Surrogacy is a great choice for gay couples or instances where both partners are assigned male at birth, as is egg donation
  • Intrauterine or “artificial” insemination is available for lesbian couples or couples with both partners assigned female at birth
  • Adoption and foster parenting are options for all couples and should be considered as well

Not only should LGBTQ+ families know all their available options, they should understand the processes, benefits, and drawbacks of each. This requires extensive research, including an examination of all applicable state and federal laws. International adoption and surrogacy both require squaring the regulations of one’s own home with those of the adopted child or surrogate. An attorney specializing in adoption, family building, and LGBTQ+ law is really essential. 

Plan Ahead

Building a family is an adventure, but it need not be an unplanned one. Couples should have plans for conception, pregnancy, budgeting, and preparation for the child’s arrival. It is especially important to assess financial resources needed for the more expensive paths to parenthood such as adoption and surrogacy. Just as importantly, parents should plan as best as possible for how their lives will change as parents and how to keep from becoming overburdened and avoid needless strain. A plan will not eliminate all the trials of family building, but it will make any anticipated situation much more manageable. 

Find the Right Specialist

When an LGBTQ+ family is ready to grow, they should seek out the best possible fertility care and treatment. Hopefully at least one partner’s workplace provides comprehensive and inclusive fertility benefits to allow employees from all walks of life to get the help they need conceiving and welcoming new members to their families. More and more options are becoming available to help LGBTQ+ parents create the families and lives they deserve, and finding the right fertility clinic and practitioners ensures these options are safe, effective, and affordable. 

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